Today was the day that I have been yearning for weeks upon end. I have this strong association between physical spaces and mental spaces and the fact that Stanford declared my freshman year over yet my room was still standing did not do well for my mental health. There was this door that just refused to budge and even close until my room was packed up and I could tell myself that it was okay to let go of my freshman year and move on as a sophomore.
My move out time was 9AM, so my mom and I got there ready to go. The packing process was excruciating. I have a lot more items than I thought I did, and we were really worried that it wasn't going to all fit in the car. There were lights to disassemble, mattress toppers and blankets to store, clothes to organize, and miscellaneous bath and food and medical items that I didn't know what to do with. I've definitely learned my lesson for next time to not pack so much. I also just want to sell a lot of my clothes. Minimalism is key.
It turns out that after your three-hour time slot, your key card access expires meaning that I was getting continuously locked out. We had to call a cleaning staff member to let me into the laundry room (which I wasn't even supposed to use) in order to grab the towel and blankets I had washed. We managed to fit everything in the car, but still ended up leaving around 3PM.
A family friend agreed to let us store my stuff at their house which was so kind of them. I don't know if they were expecting three boxes, two smaller containers, a fridge, and an ottoman, but that's what I had. I also had to attend a board meeting halfway through dropping it off.
We ended up talking for an hour in the sun and I got to reconnect with their twins who are a year older than me. I feel so fortunate to have family friends so close because even if I don't reach out to them all the time, having security matters when living out on your own.
We didn't have any plans for the rest of the evening, so I met up with my friend Ana Elena. We didn't hang out much during the school year because I was always busy with theater and school and she had her own schedule, but during quarantine, we were calling every week and watching American Horror Story together. This was the first time we had hung out in four months which felt so crazy. I couldn't believe I was in person with her.
The thing about her is that she knows how to appreciate the moment and take in her surroundings. We got take-out Mexcian food from a small restaurant next to Half Moon Bay and then ate at the beach. It's been so long since I've had deep talks with someone, and reaching that level of friendship made me feel so happy. While the sun set, we drove out to get ice cream sandwiches on University Avenue from CREAM and then ate them while we walked around campus.
We talked a lot in the courtyard of the dorm we shared, and reconnecting with a university friend while breathing in the emptiness of campus felt so bittersweet. She isn't returning to campus in the fall. but she told me that hanging out with me and knowing that she won't be returning in the fall makes her feel a little more certain that she does want to stay at home in Redwood City and still be able to visit friends on campus. I couldn't imagine fall quarter without her, so knowing that she is close makes me feel a lot more secure.
It was sad to say goodbye, but I know I'll see her in two months for sure. There's no way I can't.